First, I would like to personally thank everyone who voted. All the formerly disenfranchised who registered and stood in the rain patiently with quiet resolve for HOURS. My best thoughts are going out to those who were not fully engaged in the political arena of the United States who got out of their seats and exchanged their energies for hope in the future.
Second, I would like to especially acknowledge John McCain for his flawless speech acknowledging Barack’s win. He was poetic, fair and exceptionally generous in his remarks. No bitter pill. No sour grapes, my friends. I just wish he would have joined forces with Al Gore when there was a rumor of a bi-partisan ticket back in the day. His time has passed and I thank him for his love of our country. He left like a gentleman and a statesman.
Third, and please know I would much prefer to deliver this last message in person: THANK YOU, SARAH PALIN. You were the whipped cream AND the double-cherry on the sundae. You were the human insurance policy ensuring Barack O’Bama’s position as president-elect. You and all your idiotic behavior and one-trick pony dancing drove the last nail in the coffin. Your efforts are greatly appreciated.
Now, Sarah, one small favor, please. I would like to witness you donating all those designer togs to the second-hand store. It didn’t go unnoticed to me that you were the last one off-stage at the Biltmore Hotel after the concession speech. I am so happy you dragged out your time in the limelight, but honey, we are so over you. This last shout-out is for the lipstick wearing hockey mom: GET OFF THE STAGE BECAUSE THE CLEANING CREW WANTS TO GO HOME.
Start saving all your really good boxes, folks. We’re packing up the last Bush and shipping him back from whence he crawled.